Have my heart.
I’m falling apart at the moment and I am beyond sick of myself.
I’m off progesterone for now as it’s not working and really, it was turning me into ‘hulk SMASH’ so, while that’s leaving my system i’m a blubbering mess. I spent a good 15 minutes crying about the thought of Moo dying this evening.
I cried about the fact that i’m SURE i’m losing my hair. It’s making me crazy and I keep looking at my head in a hand held mirror.
I cried when Little Man lost his shit over lasagne for dinner and I refused to make him anything else because damn it i’m sick of making three different meals every fucking night.
I cried when he looked at me with huge wounded eyes as I put him to bed and lied to him when I said i’d come back in five minutes.
And I cried when he had a nightmare and I felt guilt that I didn’t just make him sausages like he wanted and cuddled him for five more minutes longer.
Urgh, I suck at the moment.0